Lorna Johnson, you wicked freak of awesomeness.
— Z. Campbell

So, here you are. Looking for a badass mentor to take you places you’ve never been and can hardly dream of.

An iconoclast of epic proportions who knows how to unleash your most epic self and business.

Someone who knows how to draw out your rebellious creative spirit and spiritual genius, add a dash of sales mastery you never knew you had and craft the Big Beautiful Mess of You into a massively successful, geniusly-gifted, dark witch spiritual business coded precisely to you. Your energetic DNA. Your unique frequency of sales and personal success.

No copycat crap. No funnel bullshit.

No inauthentic sales scripts.

No sleeze. Please.

Someone who can turn YOU into a mysterious, enigmatic, powerful badass mentor and spiritual superpower sought after by elite clients and who closes five-figure full pay deals with the snap of a finger and leaps over rules, systems and slow growth with a single bound—or shall we say one fell swoop of a darkly bewitched super-powered business broom.

All of that and more. Yes. We shall do.

Here’s what I’ve got going on:

The Sales Masters: London Mastermind. A kickass, high-level, in-person Mastermind in London November 30-December 1st. This is a way for you to work with me in person and become a badass Sales Master in one day. If you’re here for that, I’ve got a special page just for you. (The title above is the link. Click there and be on your sales mastery way.)

High-end 1:1 mentoring. For that, you must fill out an application, be accepted, pass an interview with me and make your payment on the phone. (I’m not cheap, babe. And I’m picky as fuck. But the results we’ll get? Astronomical. Guaranteed.) Click the link and be on your high-end-mentorship-application way.

And here: mwah! A Glenda-the-Good-Witch kiss from me to wish you the best of luck on your application journey.

An entry-level Mastermind for newbies in business who want what I’ve got and what my clients get but aren’t yet a match for my higher-end programs. There’s no application, just make the payment. It’s $500/month and you get five minutes with me 1:1, three times a month, guaranteed. My clients say five minutes with me is like three months with another coach so…can we say “No brainer”?

That’s it. Simple. Straight from the heart. In and out.

See you on the other side.